端着Rollei，每天都在想去哪里照相。春天已经过去，花儿都败了，只剩满目绿油油的杂草，连家门口的蒲公英也全都没了，rolleinar好像一下子 没了用武之地。学期末的几次熬夜，搞的黑白颠倒，半夜兴奋，白天大睡，醒来也是昏昏沉沉。加之最近天气也不好，傍晚也许久不见染红天际的晚霞，没什么兴趣 出门，唯一的可能就是上超市照点蔬菜水果，想想就泄气。其实我们小镇和C堡还是有些小景可拍，上月去C堡办税表的时候，还是春季，走错了路，开车误进了一 片住宅区，住家的小房前片片缤纷，现值初夏时节，不知是何番景象。不方便的地方便是这车，开着不能随便停，一停下拍照就不知道要多久，蹲在人家门口拍照， 又不知会不会被赶走。在黑堡里走，相机挂在胸前还是太招摇，琢磨着弄个小巧的挎包，好久了。方才又看了看附近的museum，有闲心开车去看看展览也不 错，一个人落的清静，不必求谁约谁。
再 说今天白天在床上昏沉之间一时想起在科大二教上自习时的情景，仿佛是还不认识佳佳的时候，背着书包提着水杯，稚嫩的愣头脑袋在一个个教室门窗间徘徊找座 位，5楼6楼是可以移动的灰色的椅凳，坐下，一包糖果，一瓶水，摊开书本，看不了半小时就手脚痒痒。那时虽也是不愿看书学不进去，每天仍知道背上书包水杯 去自习。如今却是连书本都不愿意碰一碰；不知道是那时懵懂且没有目标的胡乱忙碌是福，或者如今对学业，爱情甚至未来的渺茫无策至乎消极怠慢是祸？
在local找到一家pro lab，洗负片不算贵。在walmart洗120负片要等两周，3刀一卷，在pro lab洗一小时就好，4刀一卷。当时想看看pro lab底扫的效果，又索性要了底扫的服务，可惜的是底扫太贵，一卷要6刀，心里滴血啊~~~……
左侧是V500扫后在光影里调整的，右侧是店扫直接出片。店扫的乍看颜色很漂亮，颇像合肥紫罗兰的感觉，可细看，dpi太低，反差太大，细节不够，锐化的太厉害，看花朵的叶片，几乎都是白白的一团，没什么层次，同样，花朵根部完全是黑乎乎一片。当时洗卷加底扫一共用了不到2个钟头，想来也没怎么细致做活。自己扫的在左边，颜色和通透度确实不如店扫，想要更好的效果还是要好好修习PS的技巧。
下面的同样是V500和店扫的比较，自己透扫的最终颜色是以店扫为标准调整的，如若没有店扫指导，也调不出来这个效果，眼太拙啊眼太拙，色彩敏感度差了点。
Rolleinar到了，三个精致的小皮套，在翻盖上压着三角形的Rollei标志，F&H。一个一个给Rollei装上，看变长取景镜头像撒了谎又满脸无辜的皮诺曹。还有什么能比这更让人高兴？
Annual evaluation，还有半完不完的final。管它是什么，我要快快从噩梦里醒来，带着我的rollei出去拍小花小草。
连续好多天晚睡了，不甘心，再来扫负片。
Shawnee的main office门口的樱花刚刚开败的季节，拍的这两幅，惭愧不知道是什么种类的花。当时风很大，我端着Rollei站在树前对焦，一动不动等着树停止摆动的 一刻按下快门，又因为端不动Rollei太久而放下休息，来来回回好多次，旁边一对正在散步的貌似来美国探亲的老年中国夫妇好奇的看我，以为我在拍短片。
先把日志开在这里，明天来跟店扫的结果比较。
Z-turn了一下，把canon的扫描仪寄回国给元元帮着卖了，这边迫不及待进了Epson V500。今天机器一进家门就迫不及待装上试了试。
原 先在8800F上死活扫不出满意效果的几张反转片，我一直放着没有扫，觉得扫的太烂实在是糟蹋正片，今天V500刚上手就明显感觉扫反转片简直比 Canon 8800F容易了不是一星半点，用Vuescan，颜色很容易就调整的比较满意，一卷RVP 50 120，3个小时不到就搞定了。之前用8800F扫了3，4张反转片而已，用掉了2个晚上。
扫完反转片，当然试试负片，可惜小小失望，V500扫正片不比8800F容易，应该是负片本身的限制，还是需要学习PS。等以后发达了，还是上专业底扫是王道。
先看看在上次去DC拍的花草，当时测光表临时当机，只好靠我够烂的经验“目测”。听闻过许多关于反转片稍稍过曝就不堪入目的传闻，起先我以为这次死定了，不过片子出来还可以接受，基本上高光都溢出了，但是细节和色彩还是不错的。构图有待提高。
剩下是几张在家门口照的，用8800F死活扫不出来的片子，云朵的细节和层次显然没有直接看正片细腻。
BT开过duck pond，不经意看向窗外，一只鸭子正在费力拍打翅膀，想要飞起来，离地不到半米高，看着它笨重的样子我一时笑起来，心想这鸭子根本就是只走地鸭，也就飞个半米高吧。谁知，随着bus的移动，鸭子竟然在水平方向一直和bus同步前进，估计时速也有20 mile per hour了，我坐在车里看着它在起飞的10秒钟后越飞越高，一瞬间定住翅膀加速向前滑翔，速度甚至超过了bus许多。原以为这只飞天鸭飞出去鸭击长空了，突然它又来一个大大的盘旋，拍打着翅膀落在Tech Inn前的小溪边。此等豪情，估计前世是只苍鹰。
Season 1 Ep07 The Self Destruct Button
OK, anyone who says you can sleep when you die, tell them to come talk to me after a few months as an intern. Of course, it's not just the job that keeps us up. I mean, if life's so hard already, why do we bring more trouble down on ourselves? What's up with the need to hit the self-destruct button?
Maybe we like the pain. Maybe we're wired that way. Because without it, I don't know......maybe we just wouldn't feel real. What's that saying? "Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer?" "Because it feels so good when I stop.
Season 1 Ep 06 If Tomorrow Never Comes
A couple hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. "Never leave that till tomorrow," he said, "which you can do today." This is the man who discovered electricity. You'd think more of us would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of pain, fear of rejection. Sometimes, the fear is just of making a decision. Because, what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? Whatever it is we're afraid of, one thing holds true. That, by the time the pain of not doing a thing gets worse than the fear of doing it, it can feel like we're carrying around a giant tumor.
The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we haven't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. Still, sometime we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore, until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin meant. That knowing is better than wondering. That waking is better than sleeping. And that even the biggest failure, even the worst, most intractable mistake beats the hell out of never trying.
一段极好的独白，除了一遍一遍回味读给自己，找不到其他的言语来补充，更没有无谓的借口去搪塞。什么拖延症？想来大概不过是巧立名目来给自己开脱责任逃避后果。放下包袱，投入精力去做，再糟糕的结果也不会糟过从来不曾尝试。We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. 道理听了一遍又一遍，为什么总要尝尽苦果才肯脚踏实地。
Get rid of your giant tumor before it gets worse and ruins everything.
刚刚发现豆瓣的格蕾组有人总结了好多Grey's Anatomy的开场独白，真是好东西。看格蕾的时候常常觉得这些半懂不懂的独白意味深长，浮躁的我却没有一股狠劲去深究。现在有人为大家总结好了，那我就来时常复习吧。
Season1 Ep04 No Man's Land
Intimacy is a four-syllable word for, "Here are my heart and soul, please grind them into hamburger and enjoy." It's both desired and feared, difficult to live with......and impossible to live without. Intimacy also comes attached to life's three R's: relatives, romance and roommates. There are some things you can't escape. And other things you just don't want to know. I wish there were a rulebook for intimacy. It would be nice if you could see it coming. And I don't know how you fit it on a map. You take it where you can get it, and keep it as long as you can. And as for rules......maybe there are none. Maybe the rules of intimacy are something you have to define for yourself.
心甘情愿把自己的心肝脾肺肾都贡献出来让人磨碎了做burger的填料。能做到么？抱歉，我神经不够大条，小小paper cut就已经痛的龇牙咧嘴。父母亲情也许是唯一值得痛一回的intimacy。再多？我没那么伟大，况且掏出全副身家不过他人口中一个burger，食多无味的垃圾食品，连一点美丽的回味都不留。所以，intimacy这回事，实在是把玩不起。
正片的效果实在太迷人，单单直接看底片的效果已经好过我的任何一张底扫，不过扫描起来还是很艰难，糟蹋了好好的片子。
扫起底片来不分昼夜废寝忘食，没扫完，要睡了。先上几张吧
